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beautiful pink lava erupting in this dreamstate horizon
2008-05-11 1:15 p.m.

I don't open many endlessly forwarded emails. The emails I send are either personal, or sharing a new art thing I've finished and want to share with friends. Today I opened an email from a friend titled "Spread the Stupidity," that had a few silly moments in it. Rather than send it to everyome as it requests, I thought to post it here.

ONLY IN AMERICA...
  • do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
  • do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
  • do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
  • do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
  • do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
  • do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
EVER WONDER...
  • Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
  • Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
  • Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
  • Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
  • Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
  • Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
  • Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
  • Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
  • Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
  • Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
  • Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
  • Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
  • You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
  • Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
  • If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
  • If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

The last paragraph is the part that makes me cringe. I usually delete the message, for the sake of not polluting REAL mail in another's inbox:
"Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...
in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while!"

That last sentence is truth, which is why I wanted to share this here- it did make me laugh! Happy Sunday!