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beautiful pink lava erupting in this dreamstate horizon
2008-10-18 5:00 a.m.

The other day I was feeling very blue- downright depressed- for about 24 hours. Searching my situation lead to nothing solid to pin it on.

Sure my autoimmune trip is rocky. Yeah there's a feeling of unrest financially. "Oh heck," I thought, "maybe it's menopause..."

On the other hand, another piece of my writing got published at Haggard and Halloo. Bob and I are happy. Much great music has tapped my ear drums!

So with the see-saw balanced like a level, I went to bed. A good night's sleep can change a lot of feelings. Before turning in I did glance at my email inbox. An unexpected item caught my eye. "I'll open THAT tomorrow"

Well, when I opened it the following day, the reason I was feeling so blue revealed itself. This is it:

Announcement of my Death
When you receive this memo, I shall have died. The particulars of time and place will have been mentioned in the cover e-mail. I, of course, could not wait until the last moment to fill in those details. Instead, I have spent the last few days, weeks or months, deciding how to say goodbye.
First and foremost, I want to thank Susanna for appearing in my life. To each of you who receive this note, you have touched my life; some briefly and some in depth.
Thank you and Love,
Dick

I am crying as I post. At least it all makes sense now. Rest in Peace, Dick. I love you!